Foster Me Up

Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Jul 25, 2011

My Baby Girl Is Gone

In loving memory of my best friend of five years. She was at my heals at every moment, I heard her every sound, and she heard mine. She became my habit, my love, my everything. I took her everywhere I could. I never stopped thinking of her and never stopped wondering what she needed. She became my every breath.

I took care of her as if she were my child…I clipped her toe nails, gave her baths, cleaned her ears, brushed her coat, ensured she had her anal expressions and when her kidneys seemed to be failing, I put her on a diet. I took her on walks, hikes, and runs. We traveled everywhere together. She was my all and when I got a job last year and she was out of my presence, I missed her. She was so happy to greet me when I arrived home and I her. She was playful, loving, aloof, royal, but no matter what, she was my baby. I expected 10-12 years and I got five. But I will take it, ‘cause that’s what I got. She was the best thing to ever happen to me….ever…my whole life. Baci Fiona Jana, I love you and I miss you with all my heart and soul...5 months later, I still cry almost every day.

Sep 11, 2008

9/11 Tribute

Do you see a man skillful in his work? He will stand before kings; he will not stand before obscure men. (Proverbs 22: 29)
~ by Chuck Boyce ~

In memory of...our trip to NY in '07 ~ Click on the slideshow to get a larger view

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May 12, 2008

Blessings to Mom

Here's to all you mothers out there. Hoping you had a blessed and celebratory weekend. (This is a baby made out of sugar...Sweet, isn't he?)

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May 9, 2008

Have a Cuddly Weekend, All

How many eyes do you see?

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Mar 2, 2008

My Other Half.

My best friend; my twin; my other half, Robin.
In case some of you didn't know, Robin is 1/2 the reason I'm writing my memoir. We were taken away from our home, our parents and as the story unfolds, she is the one who suffers traumas I will never face. I watch her go thru pain. That is my trauma. My pain. But, together we struggle; together we survive. Here's to you, Robin.

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Jan 9, 2008

Wordless Wednesday #12

(Diego, sister's latest gift via emergency foster care - what a cutie pie!)

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Oct 31, 2007

Happy Halloween! (scroll down to see WW post)

We purchased twice as much this year, 'cause we almost ran out last year. Though this foto kinda makes me seem like a liar, there are really about 18-20?? bags in his arms!...Just enough to have a couple extra for breakfast and then lunch and then dinner & midnight snack too, I say! *big grin*

M&M successfully carved his subject with a spooky face and then looked inside. With a thoughtful expression, he says, "Honey, I don't think there's enough stuff inside to make pumpkin pie." I had to explain to him how the pie is created...*giggling* to myself, silently, of course.

Mmmm hmmmm. Foto inserted for obvious reasons -- it's in the proper color theme! *winking* Oh yeah, babe. (go ahead. click on it & get a full-screen shot. i know you want to.)

Last but not least, our daughter, the strawberry, awaiting the arrival of the first trick-or-treater! This is the best shot I could get -- she wasn't cooperative today at all! To get a better pose out'a her, I would need to do alterations to make the hood stay in place, but that ain't happen'n this Halloween!

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Oct 10, 2007

Into the Hands of Strangers

My senses are heightened. Must be because the cold is falling off. The numbness is subsiding…when I watch TV, I find myself either laughing profusely with tears falling down my face or my body tensing up, my eyes wide open and my mouth dropping to the floor when something traumatic is going on. I’m even experiencing maternal instincts…I’m 40 and this is new to me. I think this came about because I’ve been opening the lid to my past – a lid that was screwed, nailed, taped and glued shut so tight it couldn’t be opened.

....So, last night I think I’ll just quickly peruse the court documents before bed (bold move). The ones that just arrived in the mail – batch 2. Court Clerk sent me the whole 2nd half of my time in hell. Instead of quietly and hurriedly succeeding at this simple task, however, I find myself holding back the tears as I sob for fear I’ll awaken my partner, my friend, my life, MandM who has already retired for the night. My whole existence has consisted of this behavior – repressing then forgetting that it happened. Tonight, however, I read the words, saw the names of my family members: my twin who had been separated from me, my mom who had abandoned me, and my dad (days from passing) who tried to get me and keep me – more than once – and consistently failed. I’m reading these documents as if they are from a story book. I see these characters displayed on the pages and am saddened by what exudes from their state of being. Who are they that they have to suffer? They’re too young. Nobody at that age should have to go through such tragedies.

Then just like that, their mom is gone – the Courts have pushed her aside – and their dad gone too, not by will, but by the forces working against him. These girls have no choice but to fall into the hands of the legal system; into the hands of strangers.

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Sep 12, 2007

In Loving Memory: Marie F. Hays (8-10-13 to 8-11-07)

It was 1985 the last time I visited my grandma. That was 22 years ago. I didn't know her very well and never spoke to her much. But, when I returned with my brother, Curtis, in April of this year, she either didn't realize it had been that long or simply did not care -- We were her grandchildren!

My Aunt Virginia walked us into her home where she sat in her living room. Everything was exactly as I remembered -- except Grandma. She was prettier and so very sweet. I walked up to her and she stood up quickly to greet me (hard to believe she was 93)! When I approached her, I looked down into her face (she was so tiny), and I smiled, told her how pretty she was and asked her if she remembered me. She had the biggest grin on her face! It was so endearing and then she nodded and said, "Yes. Rhonda!" (How she knew that is beyond me -- mostly because I'm a twin!..guess she could've remembered a previous conversation with her daughter, Virginia...?) I gave her a hug and was so happy to meet her again.

As a young child growing up, I focused on the fact she couldn't hear very well. It was difficult for me to hang around her too long, because I simply didn't know what to say. And when I did, she couldn't hear me. Addition to the fact we didn't go see her much because we visited my mother's side of the family more.

I realize hind sight is 20-20, but I just can't help but wish it could have been different. At least I did get to spend some time with her while she graced us with her presence. May she rest in peace.

I hope anybody who knew her will please share the memories they have quietly tucked away; click on "comments" below and tell us how special she was to you.